Eternal Truths

Once over the hill, you pick up speed.

Whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.

Age is a very high price to pay for maturity.

Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip.

Men are from earth. Women are from earth. Deal with it.

Opportunities always look bigger going than coming.

Junk is something you've kept for years and throw away three weeks before you need it.

There is always one more imbecile than you counted on.

A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.

It is easier to obtain forgiveness than permission.

Dogs have owners. Cats have staff.

I know God won't give me more than I can handle. I just wish He didn't trust me so much.